现在这个地方变得很黑，嗯，小朋友们不要害怕，不会有鬼。

我发现我很喜欢作解释，对我做的任何事情，想让它们看起来听起来都合情合理，但是我又发现这样做没有什么意义，还会把一切都说死了，没有发散空间——这一点都不像我——那个毫无逻辑的跳来跳去的小人儿。所以我不说，反正说了也白说。

*

这两天一直在想摄影的事。我这辈子为自己的人生做的最正确的决定就是选了这个专业，现在想起当初差点鬼使神差走了岔道还是有点心惊胆战，幸亏最终回到正轨，否则我现在还是混混沌沌地活着，看不见梦想的世界。

我想这真是我最快乐的时光。摄影课总是上不够，拖堂就拖堂呗，饿着肚子继续听。和大家一起在暗房里“玩”，一起去外拍，最后连考试都像过节一样。想起殷老师在考摄影概论的时候给我们端来的豆浆，拿的还是食堂的大托盘，可爱得一塌糊涂呀～

还有考完试全班人一起去东东（super班主任噢耶）家，吃呀玩呀看电影呀聊天呀开心到天上去了，师母做的沙拉超级好吃！小两口子都是搞摄影的所以家里三个书架满满的摄影的书，把我们十几个人瞅得口水直流哇。。走的时候我说十年后我们再来吧。师母说，十年后，你们都带着自己的作品来吧。我们不知道未来会怎样。但是它在我们手中不是吗？

*

今天逛magnum的时候看到new book"As I was dying"，摄影师是Paolo Pellegrin，长得神似Robert Smith（hoho..）。看了一下书的介绍，很喜欢他说的这段话：

"When I do my work and I am exposed to the suffering of others - their loss or, at times their death - I feel I am serving as a witness; that is my role and responsibility to create a record for our collective memory. Part of this, I believe, has to do with notions of accountability. Perhaps it is only in their moment of suffering that these people will be noticed, and noticing erases our excuse of saying one day that we did not know. But I also feel that it is in this very delicate and fragile space that surrounds death, the space that I sometimes have both the privilege and the burden of entering, there exists the possibility of an encounter with the other in a way that goes beyond words and culture and differences . It is about being exposed for a moment in front of each other and in front of the act and mystery of dying. In that moment I feel I am looking at something that I can't completely see but that is looking at me. It is in this exchange that something simultaneously universal and deeply intimate can be found; in the death of the other there is a loss that belongs to everyone."

不过他的片子似乎过于追求形式感，有时反而减弱了他的情感表达。

说到马格南，前天在卓越上买的一堆摄影的书到了，其中一本是写马格南的，然后我才猛然醒悟原来Eliott Erwitt也是马格南的呜呜呜。。。

New York. 1974. Eliott Erwitt. 我最喜欢的作品之一

                                                                                                                 你看他多可爱

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我今天说话多么积极向上～真有成就感，哇哈哈。

Heath Ledger死了，早上被这个消息震惊了很久，看他的生平才发现居然也是4月4号生的。无论如何，走好。

"in the death of the other there is a loss that belongs to everyone."

活着的人，都要活得好好的。

给生活一个用力的拥抱吧。

然后道声晚安。